letter to our old range

Our goodbye today was quicker than I anticipated.  Those delivery guys sure know how to move appliances around efficiently.  I didn't even get to watch you go out the front door, as I was too busy vacuuming the spot where you'd been (#compulsivecleaner). 

I don't want you to think that our parting was personal.  You did the best you could.  Together, we made gallons and gallons of soup.  We baked turkeys and hams and cakes and pies.  Last winter, we roasted chestnuts more times than I can count. 

You had your quirks, but I had learned to live with them.  I knew that your back was hotter than your front and therefore I would need to flip everything around halfway through baking so that one side didn't get charred. 

I tried so hard to keep your darn drip trays clean, but it seems like you needed new ones every year.  And somehow, even though we'd tried to remember, we always ended up buying the wrong size or the wrong brand and having to return them at least once before we got a good fit. 

Not to make comparisons, but the new range doesn't need drip trays.  It just has this shiny, wipable surface with things like a warming zone and speed heat and adjustable burner sizes.  Speed heat?!  I don't even really know what it's for, but gosh does it sound exciting. 

The new range is so big on the inside that I could bake a turkey AND sweet potatoes at the same time.  And I'm not trying to brag, but I could probably fit the stuffing in with them. 

It has this large front window so that you can actually see what you're baking without opening the door.  You know I've read that opening the oven door lets out a lot of heat?  Sad, but true.  Now I can watch our dinner bake like it's a TV show. 

Incidentally, when you do decide to open the door, the light automatically comes on.  I know- it's like an oven of the future!

So really, there's no need to feel bad.  It is an oven of the future.  It's  21st century appliance and I'll admit it- I'm smitten.  I've never had a 21st century appliance before.  I'll bet the refrigerator and dishwasher are feeling real nervous right about now.  (Don't say anything yet, but the dishwasher is actually being let go next Monday.  Maybe you guys can meet up.)

We had a good run.  Farewell, old friend.